The Rise and Fall of Sir Wilfred P. Huffelbaggins III Lyrics (by Tom Smith)
I will not be imprisoned with the ordinary rabble,
I am Sir Wilfred P. Huffelbaggins,
I've no loyalty or love to those buffoons within my cabal,
It's no time for delay or lollygagging --
Gaah! The Waffle!
You're the fellow who attacked me with this
Robot, which then sent me
A million light-years from my planet!
But now I've got the controls, and I was
Wondering if it went the other
Way if I reverse and then I jam it?
-- GUH! What -- where --
Yo ho! On we go!
Way hey! All the way!
Yo ho! On with the show!
Way hey! A slaughter today!
Ahoy! Ahoy there!
Look, mates! Another one!
And who be ye?
I am Sir Wilfred P. Huffelbaggins the Third!
You believe it? 'Ere, he's royalty! Now what's the chance? Absurd!
Well, I wonder if she'd like ya deep-fried, scrambled, poached, or shirred....